When I try to speak Urdu, there are a lot of phonemes that my English-trained mouth just can't seem to make. The g/gh thing, the h/Kh thing. My Kh as in Khan is getting better, and I've almost mastered the half-r, half-d thing. But I'll never be able to roll my R's properly. Believe me, if my high school language teacher couldn't reach me in THREE YEARS, I don't think it'll ever happen. Oh, and the Gh like ghazals thing is difficult for me too. And there's a T thing - somehow there are two different kinds of Ts, and I can't even HEAR the difference between the two, much less pronounce them differently.
Other language speakers have similar issues. One of the phonemes that is especially difficult for Hindi and Urdu speakers to master is the difference between V and W. They often pronounce both as if they're one hybrid letter than sounds like a mix between the two.
The most common example is West and Vest. A lot of desis I know pronounce them the same way, and some actually can't even hear a difference between the two words when I say them. M had this same issue when I first met him, but speaking to a white girl all day for the last six years has really changed his accent a lot. He now has no problem with it - unless we've been in Pakistan for a while, or he's been speaking in Urdu a lot, or sometimes when he's just thinking so fast his mouth can't keep up - then sometimes he relapses back to the V/W hybrid. I go to school four nights a week, and my boys stay home together those nights and speak in Urdu. Sometimes at the end of the week, when M has spent four night this way, I can hear a V creeping back into his Ws.
Perhaps this is a terrible thing to fess up to, but we actually kind of use the V/W thing as a way to try and determine how desi someone is, or how recent an immigrant they are. (Or how much Zee TV they watch at home!) I know it's not a scientific or accurate measure of someone's des-ocity, but it's something I always notice!
Now, don't let this bother you if you have this language issue. It's nothing bad - like I said, I have a LOT more urdu phonemes that I can't pronounce properly. And even within America, there are regional phonetic differences. There's no right or wrong, no one is being judged or made fun of here at The Gori Wife Life!
Ve love everyone!